Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
