3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
