i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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