Porn is love you can see.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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