I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs sedatives and a leash
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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