I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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