dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
