Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
