well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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