it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
vagina is talking i cant
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
