ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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