i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
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