have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
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