i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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