Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
