omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Slut skills are useful in every country.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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