beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
