I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
