i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
