Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
