Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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