I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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