Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
