pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
