Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
It's rum buckets o'clock
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize