exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
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I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
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Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Your penis caused this!
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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