I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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