absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
