I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
He literally asked permission to hit on me
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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