I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
