What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize