alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize