he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
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No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
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My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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