Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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