In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
