i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
