doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
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The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
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I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize