just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
