im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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