Just fell off a train. Bad.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize