Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
