So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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