naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
