dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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