Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(775): View more from Nevada

Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"

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(336): View more from North Carolina

i just made my gag reflex go away.

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(941): View more from Florida

still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break

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(623): View more from Arizona

Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there

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(307): View more from Wyoming

i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets

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(330): View more from Ohio

multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.

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(518): View more from New York

He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...

(607): View more from New York

pure definition of booty call.

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