I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
