I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
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