Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
