there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize