BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
