Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
